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Understanding Your Relationship Obstacles

By Farhad Hossen March 25, 2018

How to Save Your Relationship from the Main Obstacles You May Come Across

When you get into a relationship with someone, your differing behaviors, thoughts, personalities, viewpoints, experiences, and mindsets are also intertwined within this connection. With that being said, when a relationship is made up of a significant blend of different elements, it is likely to become demanding and burdened. In order to maintain a meaningful, ideal, and healthy relationship, a lot of understanding and empathy is required. Some common obstacles can wreak havoc on a relationship if they are not identified and handled accordingly. The biggest and most frequent obstacles experienced in relationships include:

Proper Communication

 Good communication is one of the biggest challenges faced in a relationship and it is usually spoiled by automatic interpretations and misunderstandings. When two people in a relationship fail to communicate effectively, there will be a buildup of things. One person will get angry too fast and the other person ends up shutting down. An argument can escalate well beyond its limits when you start bringing up old issues that you never talked about. You may end up saying something to your partner that you cannot take back. Another aspect of ineffective communication in a relationship comes up when you have an issue with your partner and instead of talking to them to try to solving it you go and spread the problem to other people. This can affect the trust in your relationship and most people are often guilty of this.  Good communication is easier said than done for most people but it is a skill that you can practice on to improve with time.

Clashing Egos

This is another significant obstacle in relationships that does not allow two people to connect emotionally or become close with each other. If one person holds their ego at a higher level than the relationship, then this will be a problem in the relationship. Unless these two people place aside their egos to try to make peace within the relationship, then it will be hard to close the gap in your emotional connection. Each person in a relationship deserves to be treated equally because a relationship is not a race that you can win because of your ego.

Different Expectations

Behaviors and situations can go in a certain way that leads a relationship into rocky waters. When you hold too high expectations for your partner and become disappointed when they find it hard to fulfill them, this can bring about an issue in the relationship. Considering a relationship is a two-way street, if you expect something from your partner then you must equally be prepared to do it or something else for them too. If you continue harboring undefined or unethical expectations for your partner, then the relationship will definitely become strained. It is human to have expectations for others but we need to measure up to our own ability to fulfill them or understand the other party to some extent as well.

Differing Visions for the Future

Most of the time in a relationship two people will have different visions of their future. It can be about your everyday life as you progress with the relationship. One partner may want to stay home and spend time with the family on weekends while the other partner may be a social butterfly who wants to meet friends on the weekends. Someone’s goals may also be misaligned with being in a relationship or one person may not be ready to offer more commitment to the other party. It is difficult to get through this challenge without one of you giving up on something or settling. It involves compatibility and both parties in the relationship adjusting to normal changes that accompany life and aging experiences. You need to ask yourself whether both of you share enough in common to make the partnership work. You need to have a difficult conversation with your significant other to make sure you are both on the same page in terms of your futures. Define your vision to your partner while clarifying your goals for the future and your ideal daily life together. This will ensure both of you voice your views and get to know each other’s personal agenda. It is all about being honest and self-aware.

How to Overcome These Obstacles for a Healthier Relationship

Most of the time obstacles form when couples cannot communicate, or lose respect and trust for each other. In order to make things work you need to jump through these hurdles without wrecking the relationship. If you are both committed to your relationship then you will find solutions for these challenges to make it work.

Evaluate the Relationship

Have an honest conversation with each other on the state of your relationship and your feelings towards each other. Make sure you discuss the positive and the negative elements of it all. This will help you both communicate with each other and understand your feelings better so you can know where the relationship is heading and whether it will survive.

Effective Communication

Set aside time from your schedule to talk about the relationship without calling each other names or interruptions. Try to solve any conflicts in the process and it also helps if you talk about problem areas and enjoyable topics alike. This way, you will not be apprehensive about the conversation. Discuss your needs, both physical and emotional, and devise a strategy to ensure you both feel wanted and appreciated. Be grateful for the small and big things your partner does. Make compromises for the relationship by doing what your partner wants occasionally.

Cultivate Trust

Dishonesty can ruin a relationship with mistrust, suspicion, and doubt not to mention it can ruin the intimacy between you. For you to reestablish trust when overcoming an obstacle, you need to preserve agreements. Ensure there is no tolerance for any lies and maintain openness with your partner about your actions and feelings.

Remaining Present in the Relationship

There is a tendency to become disconnected in the relationship by avoiding intimacy or conflict. Some habits can also create distance between you such as activities excluding your partner, working late, home chores, emailing or texting friends, or screen time. Such problems can result in an affair or even worse, divorce. If you do not spend time together, your partner becomes encouraged to meet their needs outside the relationship. Thinking of the moments you initially fell in love and hearing them with your partner can help you rekindle the spark and have a deeper reconnection.

Balancing the Power

When the respect and power dynamic within the relationship is balanced then it is sure to thrive. Treat each other with kindness and dignity and share the emotional and financial load accordingly in the relationship. Treating your partner with respect and dignity generates a sense of protection and emotional security that encourages the success of the relationship.

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